It was a mantra projected by despot dictators hell-bent on world domination. Yes we shall. It was blared by loudspeakers mounted on surveillance drones as foot soldiers fought to suppress the voices of freedom fighters below. Yes, we shall. It was whispered in you ear by mutant serpents who extracted your DNA while you slept soundly. Yes we shall.
It is the sound that will emanate from the pyramid of darkness as the world’s energy is siphoned into a tomb that resides in the belly of said pyramid. Yes we shall.
Yes we shall enact the campestral project, which will cure polio and diabetes and allow humans to smell with their tongues.
Yes we shall harvest our most precious resources using our latest technology to distill our senior citizens into delicious milkshakes.
Yes we shall lord over mother nature with an iron fist unleashing the weather dominator creating floods and hurricaines the likes of which the world has never known.
We know the battle ahead will be long, but always remember that no matter what obstacles stand in our way they will be crushed by the power of millions of genetically modified super-men.
Now, we have been told that we can not do this by a course of cynics. Their voices will only grow more irritating and more dissonant We have been warned against using unstable nuclear devices to generate artificial earthquakes. But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything artificial about earthquakes.
And just in case you live isolated from TV ads (bless your soul) here's the original.
UPDATE Just caught this on the Internets. Bob the builder beat Barack to the old punchline. What a silly man!
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